Sunday, April 11, 2010

eavesdroppings

4-10-eavesdroppings

a quick break from a gorgeous/fun weekend (aside from one of my kids mudbombing the side of our house) to bring you some overheards that have crept into my notebook over the last few months. well, from where i heard this stuff you can see i don't lead the most exciting life, but these are some meaty verbal droppings to chew on for sure. i can't interpret that weighty bit from juice stop no matter how i bend it around in my mind. same with the philosophical intrigue from wal-mart. meant to be dissected and analyzed, or best accepted as is? clearly i was not meant to be an academic. but the really pressing question here is: does a monologue of nonsense from a cab driver count as an overheard? susie will have to confirm. she was in portland with me when it happened. so i do have one wandering destination on here after all. as for the spork episode, i had lunch with my daughter one day and was totally relieved when it was the kid across the table, and not us, who got lambasted for not touching her tray. nearly three decades out of elementary school, i'm still scared of the lunchroom lady.

27 comments:

Ces said...

OMG Aimee, the best eavesdropped statement was in Eureka, california when a hoity toity man who was crossing his legs and and waving his hand in a peculiar fashion said:

"Excuse me, I am afraid I have been charged for a cup of coffee which I am currently not enjoying."

I was on my 5th month of my first pregnancy and I thought I'd pop right there from laughing too much.

How are you?

Terri said...

hear this. i'm singing in falsetto:

LOOOOOOOOVE IT!

Gracia said...

I love the things you have overheard... some real pearlers there.

Bella Sinclair said...

These are the ONLY droppings I love to devour!

Oh my, I think the diaspora of...um...yeah, sporks is the commonality behind all that schmaltzy corporate drama. I mean, really. And thank goodness for that.

amuse me said...

I think I might just have to start carrying a notebook too! I've heard some great ones but can never remember them. I definitely know I've wanted to speak out the way the man in Ces' comment did. :)

la ninja said...

oh, my favourites are back in town. yay, you eavesdropper, you.

diasporally speaking, I also dislike vegas' world famous corporate lark. I personally find it a bit of a much-ado-heavy-schmaltzy-schpaltzy-drama-about-nought sort of affair. if you know what I mean, like.

sporks I do love, though :)
sbeam me up, scotty.

nice one, pet. I have to hang out more around 'ere. the only thing hanging at my blog at the moment is saggy and unappealing (you'll have to see for yourself, though ;)

Candied Fabrics said...

OK, you've done it - I MUST start eavesdropping! ;-) I LOVE this piece, and think you have a fabulously interesting life!

peggyfussell said...

hee hee... love 'em.

painted fish studio said...

damn, you have such a great ear!

steve said...

Haha, I'm just plain scared of the lunchroom! The ladies are nice these days, haha! In the meantime, this looks like a blast to do. I used to actually go around Pittsburgh, as an aspiring "avant-sound artist" (didn't quite work out) and record everything, including some interesting and some not so interesting conversations. If anything, it really taught me to listen more to everyday things I would normally filter out. I like how you composed this one a lot!

Jennifer said...

Too funny! It is amazing what comes out of people's mouths... especially when they don't care who is listening or (even better) do not realize people are listening.

S.E.Minegar said...

Love this post! I sometimes play what I call "capture the conversation" when I go for walks. My momentary eavesdropping exercise is based solely on the law of random proximity (i.e. I don't stalk people and listen). As I pass by, I gather sound bites and then later try to jot down as many of them I can, in the correct order. It is a fun memory exercise. And I gather some amazing writing prompts that way too!

jennifer lee said...

These are fantastic and so funny!

katef said...

this is just fabulous... love a good bit of eavesdropping but I never seem to hear anything as profound as these!

Inner Toddler said...

that cab driver was OUTRAGEOUS! I almost snorted from trying not to laugh. I had a feeling he'd resurface in the ville at some point...hysterical.

you know sporks are super useful for getting capers or olives out of tight jars without having to spill the brine. he he.

gm glimmerglass said...

Teenage son to girlfriend on phone:
"They're out there in the Japanese Garden arguing where to put the PEACE rock!"

(I positive sure there was an accompanying eyeroll)


To paraphrase Nora Ephron,
"You couldn't make this stuff up."

rachel awes said...

this piece is a blast! oh aimee,
i too hear what people say as art!
& i adore how you do it with brilliant humor! by the way, we totally own a spork & call it that! it really looks like both & it's a great giggle to say!

nathalie et cetera said...

starting the week with a big smile on my face .thank you!

lori vliegen said...

this makes me realize that i'm hangin' out in some pretty boring places.....i never hear juicy stuff like this!
LOVE your new artpiece.....xox, :))

L'Atelier said...

LOL! i love your eavesdropping! go and spy some more for us ;)

Megan Walker said...

Your eavesdropping is PRICELESS! *love it* :D

Jane said...

I hand painted a table for my old kitchen with all sorts of quotes written around the edges. My favorite: Always be nice to the lunch lady. Seriously, this is one thing I've told my kids over and over. Recently I was dropping off my daughter's check for lunch and they asked me to bring it directly to the cafeteria. I swung open the double wide doors and there she was sitting at a table reading her newspaper...Agnes, The Lunch Lady. Now we're friends and we exchange recipes :))

jane said...

this is priceless!

ambika said...

Oh my gosh, I love this. I feel like I could keep a journal of this kind of stuff alone.

Jill Berry said...

this is hilarious. I do this too, eavesdropping and scribing on napkins, paper cups, whatever. New York Delis are a great place to do this. I even thought of making a book of it, but thought again when I realized some people might recognize themselves and get even more whacked out. HA!

Jill Berry said...

In a bar, a drunk guy trying to pick up on my friend, slurred in her face,

"I don't believe you are fully comprehending my uniqueness."

Got that right.

Kellys Art Journaling/ Sharing The Journey said...

This is very intriguing and hilarious!